Marriage brings out the best and the worst in a person’s character and shows us what we are capable of doing, both positive and negative. This special relationship challenges our mental, spiritual, social, and physical selves. Unfortunately, the natural human reaction to hard or stressful situations is fight or flight.

So after a few major disagreements with a spouse, frustrated partners second guess their initial decision to wed. The wheels start turning, and the flight response to the stressful situation becomes more and more attractive.

But what can you do if the fires of passion have burned out and only angry ones remain? How can you keep your soul connection with your spouse even during times of conflict?

1. Have confidence in the decision that you have made. Then realize that just like you wouldn’t normally divorce your mom or dad when they get on your last nerve, divorcing your spouse shouldn’t be the first thing that comes to mind when he/she annoys or disappoints you you repeatedly. I know it’s hard, but it’s a key factor in the success of your marriage.

2. If God is not at the center of your relationship, consider welcoming Him into the situation. To start, only one spouse needs to make this decision, but it’s best if both of you are on the same page. Praying together, and as individuals, can provide a solid foundation for your marriage and give you greater insight into what concerns your partner the most.

3. Make mutual respect a priority in your communication. If you find yourselves attacking each other personally, instead of discussing the pros and cons of a particular decision or action, then take a step back to reevaluate the situation. Choose words that reaffirm while getting your point across. For example, instead of saying: “I hate it when you don’t make time to be with me… the kids… etc.” TRY “Remember when we did XYZ? That was so much fun and the kids loved it too. Want to do it again?” SPOUSE’S REPLY HERE “Great! What date works for you?”

Additionally, don’t let other family members–kids, in-laws, steps, exes cloud your communication with each other. When they want to butt in, *respectfully* tell them to butt out. Then re-prioritize and refocus your attention on each other.

4. Listen even if you feel like you’ve heard the same statement hashed over and over again. Sometimes venting is necessary, and if your spouse can’t release his/her mental baggage with you, to whom will they voice their concerns? The lack of listening skills in marriage is one reason emotional infidelity gets started in the first place. If you take the time to listen now, you can avoid the headaches and heartaches associated with these extramarital relationships.

5. Start a ritual just for the two of you. Ideally, you’ll both take time out to do it every day or a few times a week. Engaging in ritual behavior, like sharing coffee, watching funny movies together or taking walks, gives you something to look forward to and can help you build intimacy.

6. Consider an organized marriage retreat. Retreats are great because, the facilitators give couples helpful tools for communicating, relating and often mating. You’ll see other couples who are going through the same challenges, and you’ll have time to focus solely on your relationship. No work, no kids/in-laws, no well-meaning friends, and no focusing on the ills of life.

7. Finally, make a point to get away every once in a while. This idea dovetails from the previous suggestion, but this time you and your honey will be alone. Whether you get your kids out of the house for a weekend or you book a seven day vacation to the Bahamas, it is necessary for you and your husband or wife to have extended alone time without any distractions.

Don’t let your marriage slip from your grasp… Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love at save your marriage today. You can get started saving your marriage in the next 10 minutes. Go to http://www.marriagenotdivorce.com/Recommends/Save-Marriage.htm now to help save your marriage and stop divorce.

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Myth: If you forgive your spouse, you forget the problem.
Truth: Chances are that you will not forget the problem. However, you can forgive your partner for what he or she has done. Certainly, the issue will remain in your thoughts and that is perfectly normal. The act of forgiveness is only the first step to resolving troubles.

Myth: If you forgive, you are showing approval for what he or she has done.
Truth: On the contrary, approving or condoning an action has nothing to do with forgiveness. You can still acknowledge your disapproval and give the other person another chance.

Myth: Forgiveness means you trust your spouse.
Truth: Once trust has been broken, it can take quite awhile to rebuild faith in that person. In fact, if you immediately trust your partner, you could be damaging your relationship further by making them think it is acceptable to violate your trust again.

Myth: Once you forgive, everything will be perfect in your relationship.
Truth: This is not necessarily true. First, no relationship is ever truly perfect. Next, there will still be work needed to make your marriage the relationship you desire it to be. You will probably continue to have unresolved feelings which you will need to work through.

Understanding the truth about forgiving can help you through the actual process. This is one of the first steps you and your spouse must take in order to save your marriage. You can begin learn how to restore your relationship and get back to the marital bliss of your honeymoon days.

Don’t let your marriage slip from your grasp… Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love at save your marriage today. You can get started saving your marriage in the next 10 minutes. Go to http://www.marriagenotdivorce.com/Recommends/Save-Marriage.htm now to help save your marriage and stop divorce.

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Respect Each Other
Being disrespectful to anyone is not going to make them like you, so how much worse can it be to treat your spouse without respect. This is the person you chose to spend your life with and he or she should deserve your utmost respect.

Communicate
You have probably heard this many times, but communication is important. When something is wrong, you need to talk to your spouse about it. Be honest, respectful and positive. Also, talk about the good stuff happening in your lives. It doesn’t always need to be just about problems. Remember to listen to your spouse as well. Speaking is only half of the act of communicating.

Forgive
Disagreements are sure to arise from time to time. When your spouse has made a mistake or done something really stupid, you need to learn to forgive him or her. Don’t let bitterness take over. Keep in mind, you have probably done some dumb things too and need forgiveness.

Appreciate Each Other
It can be so easy to forget to acknowledge the little things your spouse does for you. Daily activities can become routine, but it is always good to tell your spouse “thank you” and let him or her know how much you appreciate the things they do.

“Date” Each Other
Spending time together by going on dates can spark the fire of love again. Break up the regular routine and go out to dinner, go for a walk, or any thing you both like to do. If going out is not feasible for you, have date night at home. The important thing is to spend time together to reconnect with each other.

Intimacy
This is one area of your relationship that you need to keep going. Again, the daily activities in our lives can make this seems like the last thing we even want to think about at the end of the day. However, intimacy and affection are important parts of a marriage where you should skip out on.

Marriage is not easy and does take work to keep the relationship growing and not becoming stagnant. By taking steps now to save your marriage, you can begin to revitalize the most important relationship in your life.

Don’t let your marriage slip from your grasp… Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love at save your marriage today. You can get started saving your marriage in the next 10 minutes. Go to http://www.marriagenotdivorce.com/Recommends/Save-Marriage.htm now to help save your marriage and stop divorce.

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Discuss Your Financial Situation

Sit down and talk about your finances, your current money situation and ways you can get it all under control. There are many options available such as debt consolidation or credit counseling. Both of you should look at all of the options and determine the best solution for you and your situation.

Create and Follow a Budget

One of the main steps to regaining control of your finances is to make a budget and follow it consistently. Gather all of your bills and write down the balances, minimum payments due, payment due dates and any other pertinent information along with monthly income. Also make sure to included any other expenses such as groceries, clothing, entertainment, etc. Look over your newly created budget and look for any unnecessary expenses you could eliminate or reduce.
Once your budget has been created, make sure to follow it every month to help keep your finances in line.

Over spending can really wreck havoc on your finances. If this is a major source of concern in your marriage between one or both partners, it will be especially important for you to stick with your budget.

Make a Plan

Finally, you need to make a plan to get out of debt. There are many ways to get rid of all of your debt, but the best plan will be the one you stick to and follow consistently, just as you would with your new budget. Without a plan, your finances and marriage will just continue to worsen.

Now that you have these three tips, you need a guide to help you achieve these goals. More detailed information can help you to quickly save your marriage and get out of debt. Make your choice today for a better future.

Don’t let your marriage slip from your grasp… Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love at save your marriage today. You can get started saving your marriage in the next 10 minutes. Go to http://www.marriagenotdivorce.com/Recommends/Save-Marriage.htm now to help save your marriage and stop divorce.

Get Spontaneous
Even though there is nothing wrong with having daily routines, they can surely make things boring if nothing ever changes. Break up the monotony by doing something totally new and different. Plan a date night and go somewhere you have never been before. Instead of making it a weekend date, you could go out on a (gasp)… Wednesday!

Weekend Getaway
Plan a romantic weekend away for just the two of you. This does not need to be expensive. Getting a room at a local hotel and nice dinner can be done inexpensively. As much as you love your children, spending time alone together is very important for the health of your marriage. Even if you do not have children, just getting away from daily life can be beneficial.

Intimacy
Being intimate with your spouse can become routine like as well. Change things up and do something different. Surprisingly, some people are afraid to talk to their spouse about intimate things they desire. If you feel comfortable, open up to your spouse about what you would like and see what he or she would like as well. You may just be surprised by the reaction you receive.

Keeping your marriage exciting does not need to be a chore. Try these tips and you are sure to spice things up and save your marriage in the process.

Don’t let your marriage slip from your grasp… Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love at save your marriage today. You can get started saving your marriage in the next 10 minutes. Go to http://www.marriagenotdivorce.com/Recommends/Save-Marriage.htm now to help save your marriage and stop divorce.

1. Be patient with each other. This situation did not happen overnight or even in a week, so do not expect overnight miracles either. Try to overlook the minor issues an not get exasperated and frustrated when he or she does not respond right away. Remember, patience is a virtue.

2. Have conversations with each other, but not arguments. Discuss the things both of you need and want from your marriage, but keep the words and the tone of your voice on a positive level. Realize that neither one of you will “win” and argument, but both of you “win” with positive discussions. Try to come to resolutions on your problems by tackling each one separately and learn the art of compromising.

3. Everyone loves to be praised so praise your spouse often for all of his or her good qualities and actions. Build each other up instead of tearing each other down. Sit down and make a list of your spouse’s best qualities and all of the things that made you fall in love with him or her. Make a point to mention one of these each day or even several times a day. Doing this small action will show your partner that you do care and notice the good things about him or her.

4. Show your love. Look at your spouse in the eyes when he or she is speaking to show you care about what he or she has to say. Get physical. This can be as simple as a touch when you pass each other, a quick kiss, a wink, or a hug. These little actions can mean so much more than any spoken words.

5. Above all, be positive. Negativity in any relationship is not good. Not only does it harm you marriage, but it is not good for you physically either.

Hopefully, these tips helped to answer the question of how to save your marriage and keep your spouse. Sometimes the problems are much deeper and if this describes your situation, remember there is help available.

Don’t let your marriage slip from your grasp… Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love to save your marriage today. You can get started saving your marriage in the next 10 minutes. Go to http://www.marriagenotdivorce.com now to help save your marriage and stop divorce.

Leave “love notes” for your spouse in their car, briefcase, refrigerator or anywhere around the house where you know he or she is sure to not miss it. Try leaving a sweet and romantic message on his or her voice mail.

Listen to the things you spouse says he or she likes and then surprise him or her with a special gift. It could be a special book or bubble bath your wife says she would like to get sometime. Or, it could be a CD or DVD your husband has mentioned wanting to buy.

If your loved one has a chore he or she really dislikes doing, occasionally do the task for him or her. If your husband normally takes out the garbage, get the bags out for him. If your wife does the laundry, throw a load in the washer and dry for her.

Most people love to be pampered in some way and who does not like receiving a massage? Pamper your spouse by giving a foot, back or full body massage. You could alternate nights so both of you could fully the enjoy the relaxing benefits on your night.

Go out on a date… with your spouse of course! It does not need to be an extravagant outing, unless you both want it to be. You could have a simple picnic or go on a walk. Go some of the places you went to on dates before you got married.

Try some of these ways to rekindle the fire and get creative and come up with your own. However, if your marriage needs more help than these tips can give, please realize that there are other ways you can save your marriage.

Don’t let your marriage slip from your grasp… Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love to save your marriage today. You can get started saving your marriage in the next 10 minutes. Go to http://www.marriagenotdivorce.com now to help save your marriage and stop divorce.

Relationship strategies consist of, or can be broken down into two components: relationships and strategies.  Let’s take a look at relationships first!

1/ Relationships can only exist if there are two parties involved.  There’s no such thing as a  “singular” relationship. There has to be at least two persons in the relationship.  These two persons have to have something in which both of them are in agreement with.  Otherwise, they would not bother to correspond / talk / share with each other.  Whatever it is that they are in agreement on, it’s entirely up to them for the relationship to work.

2/ Strategies

A course or courses of action designed to achieve a specific objective or purpose.  Strategies are very important. They are essential ingredients in one’s journey to success.  No matter how good or noble an objective might be, it would be very difficult, if not impossible to achieve without strategies.  Think of it this way.  Without relationship strategies, it would be like driving your car without even knowing where to go and why you are driving it in the first place.  Doesn’t make sense at all, does it?

Let’s focus our attention to relationship strategies then, specifically relationships between couples who found love and decided to be together, to love each other, and to nourish and nurture the love that binds them together.

One of the first things they should look into is to determine the purpose why they are together.  Each relationship strategy they formulate should adhere and point to the purpose they established in the first place.  Then, as they go along, they determine what to do and what not do as they work together to achieve their purpose.  It is wise to keep the objectives simple and clear so that the strategies would be clearly defined as well.

It is pointless and inconsistent if the strategy does not point to the objective.  If the strategy is not followed, what was done and the result thereof will still be pointless and inconsistent.  Therefore, couples should make a conscious effort to carefully study what their objectives must be as well as the relationship strategies that lead to their achievement.

Examples of relationship strategies are: To take time to look at the mirror together and look at your partner, not yourself; during arguments, the couple can either sort it before they go to sleep or right after they wake up when their minds are at its calmest state; make anniversaries of special and intimate moments even if they seem tiny and simple; always remember to be grateful for the little gestures of affection your partner does for you; learn what and what not to do and say to make your partner mad; love your partner a little bit more than they love you, so on and so forth.

Formulating relationship strategies comes easy if the couples are serious about what they are doing and strongly believe that they are there for the long haul.  If not, they would not find purpose in formulating them.  The thing to remember is to determine what the objectives are and then formulate relationship strategies that will lead to their achievement.